Private Matter; Public Space

[De'Ryanna Aybara]

Tobias got the letter when the receptionist said he would. He needed to think about it. Wasn't much he did these days without taking time to consider things. Dex would've had something choice to say about that fact but he wasn't around anymore. So Toby could do his routine in peace. He almost showed Sammy the letter but couldn't bring himself to do it. Seeing De'ryanna went against his gut. Problem was he let so many days go by that it started to get rude. The reply was delivered to De'ryanna by standard mail carrier. Nothing fancy. A brochure for a place called Cheekwood Indoor Gardens which had a map and everything included in the brochure information. The brochure was wrapped in a piece of plain white paper addressed to her. The paper was rubber banded around the brochure. When she took the paper off she'd see what was written: "Tuesday 16.2.2010, 3pm. TJK."

De'Ryanna was wanting a response to her letter and yet she tried to convince herself that no response was coming and to put the idea out of her head. It was better that way. Better to stay focused and think on task and .. and things that wouldn't get her riled up. But all that thinking had only got her thinking about why she was thinking on the note in the first place. As mail came to the Inn she sorted it out and delivered it to the proper places; and when she got the letter addressed to her she paused and stared at it a moment or two before opening it. Indoor Gardens. A tinge of nervousness started to rise and she quenched it quickly. Tuesday. She would be there. When the day came she dressed as she normally did though her bodice and skirt were an earthy brown, the rest of the color cream. She was taught to always be on time - unless you were making the person wait for a reason. She had no reason to make him wait and didn't' want him to think that she was trying to put him off, therefore Ryanna arrived at Cheekwood at 2:45pm on that Tuesday afternoon. It had been a long time since she had been in an indoor garden and certainly none of them since arriving in Rhydin. Her hair was back from her ears and she used them to listen in on the sounds around her as she tried to appear casual while standing near the lilies. Now and then she would cast a quick look around while she stepped around by the area.

Tobias was the kind of guy who showed up less than a minute before whatever hour he was due. It was just the rhythm he was raised with. The presence of his family was demanded at a lot of places and he was dragged around a lot growing up. A life of just barely on time. There were a couple of reasons he picked this place. The main one was that if it were a warmer month he'd have opted for a public outdoor place. This nine acre glass garden was the closest to that he could find. He walked through the gigantic iron gates which weren't far from the lilies. Hands were in his pockets. He wasn't dressed in his construction gear. He had leave for another day. Sudden trip to Boston has been the cause of that. It was the cause of why he looked pretty clean too. Hadn't gotten a haircut this time since there was no funeral but besides his dreads he was clean shaven and showered. He wore cargo pants and a t-shirt under a dark green sweater with a single blue stripe. He was quick to spotted her and nodded in her direction. "Hi." Short and sweet when he was close enough to be in earshot.

She didn't turn her head at every opening of the gate, that would have been too obvious, but she did look every now and then. When Tobias came through it was not a time she had turned to see. But she could smell him, amidst the smells of the plants and other people, when he got close enough and it nearly caused her to flinch. Suddenly she wasn't ready to see him, didn't know why she was here and was having what she thought to be the typical teenager panic attack. Even though it lasted only all of a few seconds. After he greeted her she pushed down the nerves the best she could and put on a smile, turning to have a look at him. "Hello Tobias. Thank you. For seeing me." Of course she took in his appearance and thought that he looked good in the sweater. "You look nice." might as well say it.

"I don't know if you should thank me." He didn't specify why but it probably had to do with the fact that being here went against his gut. "I was just home." That was his explanation for why he looked anything that could be called nice. Even if it was an older sweater it wasn't as ratty as some of his. Hands in his pockets the tops of them could still be seen some. Enough to tell that he was wearing gloves. Shouldn't be a surprise, they were out in public. "Figured we'd walk." He started them off. Heading down the only walkway deeper into the garden. Farther they went the more options they'd have when the path started to split off. This place was more than gardens. Had a couple restaurants and a small market. A boat ride and tours of the grounds. "Neat trick, how you sent that letter. How'd you figure where I worked?"

She would thank him because it was polite to do so and she wanted to. It was the right thing to do in her book. When he started away she clasped her hands in front of her and locked them together. It was for the best. It gave her hands something to do that didn't involve touching him - which her body was telling her to do. Tobias was right there and he was starting to fill her senses. Ignore it. Ignore it. This was nice the time. The walking helped to. The movement around them and the other things to be aware of. "I don't mind the walk. It's better than boring a hole through the plants with my fingers....” She cleared her throat a bit and glanced at him a bit before looking forward again. She was walking on his left side. "I searched for you. As to how the letter got to you. I remember you telling me that you worked in construction and, after what happened, and things afterwards I wanted to speak to you." She kept her tone at a conversational level for the two of them. "I made a list of the construction places in Rhydin, started out in the morning and traveled to every one of them until I found the right one. It was important that I give that to you."

What did you want to say?" That probably wasn't keeping it conversational. Because conversational is small talk, right? Fact was Tobias wasn't too great at stuff like this. He was more like f-cking awkward about it probably because he usually walked away from situations like this. He didn't know what the hell he should say so he jumped on the fact that she seemed to have something to say. When the path split for the first time he kept them walking on the center one. The main drag through the garden was the one with the most people. Pretty crowded today. Lots of people hiding from the cold. He didn't walk fast. This wasn't about being quick or breaking a sweat.

If he had gone any faster than the casual walk she would have asked him to slow down. She didn't need the pace of her steps to equal her nerves. "What I put in the letter." Yes,.. that was obvious and it was avoiding the answer in a way . "I wanted to say that I was sorry, because I am." Her eyes lingered on a set of plants they passed by. Even when they had to make way for other people she stepped out the way to avoid any accidentally contact with Tobias. "I haven't...bare with me I'm not use to this." She took in a deep breath and held it a moment, her hands tightening. "I can't stand the way that we parted and I can't turn back the clock to insert the pieces that should have been in place but weren't." She stopped, pausing really, when they got to the point where she could see the fountain. "I forgot myself and never intended to put you in any harm. "

He respected that she got right down to business. It was something he liked about Ryanna period and was probably why he'd told her as much about himself as he did. A son of politics he really appreciated someone who wasn't full of BS. "Yeah, I'm pretty pissed off about that. I was honest with you about my mutation and how I felt about it. What that guy can do through you was a pretty huge f-cking thing to leave out, considering." He glanced at her, adding his own question into things. "Why're you not used to this?" Just because he probably knew the answer didn't mean he didn't want to hear her say it. "What about how we parted would you want to fix?" Added as an afterthought and he turned back to watch the path in front of them.

"No. I'm not use to this. Caring about what the other person thinks or how they're effected because I usually don't have the opportunity to get close enough to someone to care." Her hands nearly came apart, she pulled on them anyway and they unfolded, but they didn't come apart and she barely bit back the huff that was there in her throat. She took a moment to settle her thinking. "I would want to change it so you didn't look at me like the enemy. I don't know how to fix it and realize I probably can't. I know that was a big thing to forget to tell but sometimes I like to believe that if I don't think about it he'll leave me alone." she hadn't looked at him for a while now and she wasn't doing so now either. "You were inviting... you didn't care about the things I could do... you wanted to touch me and all my precautions seemed to vanish, only to come back in bits and pieces and made a mess of everything." That's what's called being an adult. She was - she thought - taking responsibility for her actions.

And she was young. That'd crossed his mind once or twice maybe that she was pretty young but this was the first time he thought about that in a while. How much experience -could- she actually have in all this when she was how old she was? He was smart enough not to bring that up. "That's where you and me are different. I don't have to be close at all to care. What happens if I'm careless isn't something I'd wish on a stranger any more than I'd wish it on my Mother. I know you don't get living a life like that but it's just the way I am and I don't think it'll change." He didn't know how saying that would help things but he felt like it needed to be said. If there was one think he needed her to get about him it was that. "My brother thinks we're higher up than regular people because we're stronger. He steps on anyone who threatens him no matter who it is. I refuse to attack anyone weaker than me. Even if they come at me first. I care about the safety of the people who my brother'd call weaker than me and him. Because my strength can really screw them up."

I care about people. I'm starting to." That was when she started walking again. She would veer to the left and take the upward incline when next they were approached with options on directions. "I don't discard people like they are dirt underfoot. Just that in growing up I wasn't taught to care for all the people around me. It was take care of those who mean something to you and the people that you belong to. But being in the Inn has helped." That was a good way to put it. She knew that he was a caring person. When he told her about his want to not hurt anyone because of his ability that about said it all. "I care that the people there get what they need.. and I have a care for the people I come in contact with while going about business... and I care to not see them get hurt and accept the fact that I just can't act like a normal person because of him. I like that you care." She paused and lightly licked her lips. ""Its something that I admire. I know some who cast off the lives of others. I don't think I'm that cruel. Just… the chance to be normal sparked and I'm sorry that I wasn't as aware as I should have been ."

He'd roll with her change of direction. Keeping a step behind her since she wanted to take the lead on where they went. What she was saying early on made him shake his head. It wasn't how he'd wanted what he said to be interpreted. "I wasn't criticizing you, Ryanna. I wasn't telling you that I want you to be like me. I don't expect you to be. I was just trying to explain myself. I'm not measuring your personality or behavior or anything by some scale. Don't worry about that." He paused. He had to really think about how he wanted what he said next to come out. "You can be normal, Ryanna. I'm pretty sure 99.9% of the people you touch don't have an ability that can be stolen and used to spread a humanity-killing plague or something equally colorful."

"Doesn't stop him from simply killing people because he's bored now does it?" she said back to him, even turning her head to look at him as she said it. De'Ryanna looked at him for the count of five before turning and starting away on the path again. She fully believed that Benjamin did some of what he did because he was bored, that and because he didn't want her to get closer than casual with anyone. "You know what it's like, to make a friend and suddenly have them taken from you for one reason or another. They suddenly have a change of heart, mind, vanish without a trace and being left alone. Again." that was when her mood changed in a small degree and she nearly frowned, though he wouldn't see it unless he was watching her face. "It was like that for years until i stopped trying to be close to anyone. I stopped trying and wanting the companionship and touch and people were well. I like to think that because you do have an ability... you could protect yourself. Silly reasoning.”

"That's life Ryanna. People come into your life and then they go. That's the cycle. Does the reason they go really matter? Some die of heart attacks. Others move away across the country. Others get a spouse who doesn't like you. Others stop liking you themselves. Fact is a lot of people in your life won't make it past a few months or years but that doesn't make you different than anyone else. In the universal sense. We all have to take the risk. Of opening up and trying at closeness with someone only to have them leave or get taken away. Hell, my own twin might not be in my life five years from now, two years from now, next week, for some reason or another and we shared a damned womb." God. He hadn't said so much in weeks. Maybe almost as much to his family this last trip home but most of that had been just repeating one word. "It's not silly. There's a way I have to protect myself. And am."

The frown she had turned into a straight line and she almost furrowed her brows and was just shy from doing that. "Splendid answer: 'that’s life', you sound just like my mother." And he did. Talk about person who did a job and got things done no matter the cost it had attached. "Yes, people come and people go, at least you have someone who cares enough about you to follow, check in and make sure you're all right." She was talking about Samantha. "So perhaps your right and I should live like any other person and let people come in and out my life like a revolving door because that's just life. In my life one moment and out of it the next." She was doing a good job at not raising her voice while in the public - kinda quiet - setting. She felt like doing other wise and she was aggravated at the fact that she wasn't able to express herself in the way that she wanted in order to be effective. "I want something to be constant, dependable even if it's only for a little while. Something other than the fact that people are going to leave. I want someone that I can depend on and talk to and .... touch and I don't want that person to be him!" Ryanna lost it in the end, but only by a little. Her hands parted from each other and hit against her skirt instead to grip it tightly as she spun around to face him. "Why's it so damn hard to talk to you? Why can't you be him?" Nearly two different questions said and then wished she hadn't said them just as soon as they were out of her mouth.

“You know how much time I spend meditating and you're surprised I have a that's life attitude?" That was probably the wrong thing to say. It was the logical thing. The kind of thing where you have a point but the girl doesn't seem to happy you pointed that out. It was because of all that meditation that he was probably so calm. Which probably didn't help any either. Upset people didn't seem to like calm. What he was absorbing, the substance that solved things, it was the sturdiest substance known to man. Hard not to be calm when he absorbed that. When she cut his path off he came to stop. Just watching her and listening. He saw how she moved. Heard her tone. He knew she was upset. "If you want me to be him why not just go for him? Trying to make me him seems like a whole lot of extra work to me."

"Don't be stupid." Said in a rather flat tone. He wasn't stupid and she almost thought that maybe he was joking with the last thing he said. "I'd never want you to be him. I hate him. I hate the hold he has on me, I hate the forced connection I have with him, I hate that he tries to make me see that I don't have a choice but to do what he wants me to do. " Ryanna closed her eyes a moment - or maybe more than a moment - and stilled herself. "I don't hate you; I hope that you don't hate me. I don't want you to walk out of my life." Having her eyes closed was good, but she couldn't keep them that way and so she opened them slowly.

“What the f-ck!" Closest he'd come to raising his voice. Definitely wasn't a calm tone. It was a little defensive maybe. "I was just going off of what you said. You just said why can't I be like him, you must have had some reason. Do you mean why can't I just be like him and not walk out of your life just like he doesn't?" He was seriously asking. Trying to figure this out. "I don't hate you. I've been pissed off at you. Those are different. And me being pissed isn't what made me leave. Sammy and I left to try and sort this out. Make sure that no one got hurt. I needed to think. I can't do it at the Inn I just can't. So I went elsewhere."

Maybe it was a guy thing. Maybe it was a female thing. A person thing. Whatever it was it caused her to claw at either side of her neck with her hands. Surely they made some people turn their heads in their direction. This had to be why she didn't talk to people because whenever she strayed from a particular set of what to do with clear cut instructions it ended up like... this. "Bloody ashes I need more practice in this." And a good hard bag to punch, but she kept that out as pushed her hands down on the air and took a nice long exhale. "Like him. Like how he is connected to me like him." Did that make better sense? "It's harder to explain thoughts and, and, and feelings for a person when they're not already in your head." She said that more to herself but it was there for him to hear. "That be like him. Does that make more sense? Why can't you be like him and I have that connection with you instead of with him." Don't yell, don't raise your voice... she could be calm, though she could feel the fire turning over in her stomach. "I didn't know you were just upset. I walked out of your room that night and I thought it was the end. Over. Close door and file it away and it hurt, Tobias, and I, I, thought that must have been how you felt when I told you and thought that if I were you I probably wouldn't want to see me again. And I didn't want that and that's why after I got sense knocked literally back into me I wanted to find you because I only know things to end." She would stop there…maybe she said too much, she thought she said too much and now she was clenching her jaw shut.

[De'Ryanna Aybara]

"I don't know about that Ryanna. An argument's going to happen when it happens and I'd sure as hell avoid having them in my head. I like it this way. The old fashioned way." He pulled a hand out of his pocket to gesture between them. Where was a half a grin when it said it. Probably because he knew grinning full out would just get him slapped. It wasn't like he found this funny at her expense or anything. It was just on one level funny. Maybe it was an age thing. Because he had more practice. It was probably that practice that had him just asking questions back at her instead of replying directly to what she said. "What do you want, if you don't want this to end? How do you see things working out?" He slid his hand back into his pocket. Watching her.

The easy answer would be to say 'I don't know' but she couldn't say those three words because she did know and saying that she didn't would be a lie. So instead she watched his hand as it slid back into his pocket and chewed on the inside of her cheek as her brain tried fast and hard to find a way around the actual answer. Not an easy thing to do when you couldn't lie. "I don't see things working out at all if we can't get past differences. " It was true, there were a few ways of thinking that put them on either side of the board. "But differences are needed. I want to bond with someone of my own choosing. Like before. With you." A bit vauge. Maybe he'd catch it. She let out a breath in a puff. "Like how I choose you that night." Better.

"Differences." He scoffed it. Shook his head and waved his hand like a silent "nah". "We got a lot bigger problem to work out than differences." Tobias stepped in closer to her. They were about eight inches apart. He pulled his right hand out of his pocket and held it next to her cheek. He didn't touch her cheek though. There was about an two inches of air between it and his hand. Blue eyes kept on her. "I don't want some guy with a bad attitude stealing and putting what I have to use, Ryanna. If that isn't solved, this is not going to work out. Not that I'd walk out of your life. But there wouldn't be a whole lot of connecting going on." In any sense of the word. He didn't smile this time. The way he said it might have been funny but he was being serious now.

She watched him come closer and felt the fire in her body raise up a notch or two, but she didn't move - but there was a slight flicker around her eyes that went as quick as it came. Her hands partially flinched at her side and though she was watching him Ryanna had to turn her eyes slightly away when his hand came near her face. "I know....and I don't hold that against you." How could she when she didn't want her abilities being used at that man's pleasure either. "And I'm wanting to get that resolved." At least Tobias had soothed one fear that had been nestled in her chest - the one that he was going to leave. Soothed but not gone for things were not fully settled. After a moment she turned her eyes back to him.

He nodded. He was glad to hear that. With some of the stuff they'd said to each other before when the disagreed he half expected her to argue. That they didn't was enough to keep him nodding. "Good. Looks like we understand each other then right?" As he dropped his hand, sliding it back into his pocket, he looked a little smug. She was about to find out why. "So I don't know what you're freaking out about." Might as well have just tacked on "women" to what he just said with the way he said it. Maybe he was serious. Or maybe he was just looking to lighten the mood. If he noticed the tension and small movements that came into her body when he got closer to her he didn't say anything about it. If he was feeling anything like that himself it didn't show. All that meditating made his body language tight as a Zen fortress.

"Why don't I just bite you, right now, and then we'll talk about freaking out." She really did hope that he wouldn't call her bluff because, for one, she didn't really know how to bite a person in that sort of way and doing it here in the indoor garden would simply be odd. But she would, if he called her on it, so hopefully it wouldn't come to that. Her words weren't said in a mean tone, they were just said. "So don't give me that look...." she had to do something with her hands and so she put them behind her back. "You should be lucky." said with a nod of her head. "This means that I get to hold my slaps until I can touch you..."

"Exactly. You can't do anything about my look." So there. She shouldn't be asking him to stop when she couldn't do anything about it. Starting down the path again. Now that the air was cleared out this walk felt generally better. He shrugged his shoulders. "If you slapped me I don't think much would happen. Far as him taking anything. You'd hurt your hand like hell, I guess that counts as something?" Tobias still had something attached to the underside of each of his gloves. Thin as a dime and about as big as a quarter sometimes even he forgot they were there. The particular thing he'd been constantly absorbing for the past couple weeks wasn't the easiest thing to carry around in his body. It was a good thing he had the demolition work to work the mood it put him in daily out.

De'Ryanna didn't say anything,. she only started to follow along a partial step behind him. "What are you wearing Tobias?" Asked in a questioning tone as she was looking him over again. She did feel better.. slightly more confident and motivated in other areas that she wasn't likely to talk about. She took a moment to breath deeply in the scents around her, trying to not focus on those of the various humans or cough on any intense smells. There were a few. "And I don't mean your clothes..." she leaned in a bit in his direction. "I could still hit you... If I wanted too, but it wouldn't be as gratifying."

"I bet it wouldn't feel gratifying at all." He wasn't kidding when he said hitting him would hurt. It was the Bitch of all things to absorb. Tobias has pulled some big strings and dropped his last name more than once to get even this small piece of it. If she was inhaling like that to sniff out what he was wearing he had a couple smells to him. His aftershave. The detergent Sammy washed their clothes with. The kinds of fabric he was wearing period. Some sweat. And a metal. Far as metal went it probably wouldn't be one she ever smelled before. It was rare. "I can't really answer that, Ryanna. First of all I'm not too proud of how I got my palm on it in the first place." Second of all it was probably just plain better that she didn't know. He wasn't walking fast. Slow stroll nowhere in particular. It was a nice place. More than just gardens it had a river running through it, a couple bridges over that twisting river and nice paddle boats that chugged along. Whole thing was encased in glass and with the sunny day outside the place was lit bright and warm.

"Fair enough." She understood that not all information had was information that could be shared. It was the way of politics and keeping an upper hand. Some things were on a need-to-know bases and her curiosity didn't fit the quota. Sorting out all of the smells one in particular made her chuckle. "I remember one smell off of you...” probably wasn't going to say it because it was one of those 'funny' things. "I'd like to walk towards the boats, if you don't mind. I've never seen them and I only wish to look." that thought made her close her eyes a moment as she cleared her throat, but it only caused her to exhale again. "Thank you for bringing me here. After a few weeks ago the I haven’t' been anywhere really. Save that day I went all around looking for you. I think I needed to get out. "

"I bet there isn't just one smell you remember." He was a dirty hippy. He wasn't afraid to admit that sometimes he had a bad case of funk. Made him glad he couldn't smell himself. Though if he could that would probably cut down on the problem. He looked surprised to hear her pipe up about where they should walk. He wasn't opposed to it. Better than to have a direction in mind than the random walking he'd planned on doing. "Yeah, sure." Meant taking the fork to the right when the path split just ahead and he was sure to do that when the time came. "I'm glad you did." He didn't sound totally sure about that. But he was more sure when he'd sent her the note to meet him here so that was something at least. "I didn't know if something'd happened to you. I saw this flier of your picture one day and saw a couple of girls whispering about it."

"And I thought it was scheme..." Though she wasn't too happy that he knew about those fliers, but the rest of his statement said that he didn't know much else. "Something did happen to me Tobias. I was so angry and hurt that I went off to fight but my opponent was more than I could chew." She kept up her pace but the small heel of her shoe hit against the floor more to sound off her bit of frustration. "I wasn't lying when I said that I would be okay if I got hurt and the rest, but I got pretty banged up that night and would have died if I were normal. The fact that I was still alive while bleeding to death caused a man to take interest in me and i was followed until I was able to teleport out." She was looking around at the plants and trees as they walked. "Doctor Blake and Thor helped to heal me since the other bastard said he was giving me what I wanted. I don't know if he's still out there or not but I'd rather not have some hyped up bounty hunter on my head."

She was saying the word 'he' a lot and it was hard for Tobias to keep straight which 'he' she was talking about each time she said it. He furrowed his brow as he listened and tried to do the best he could to sort it out the first time round. "Fight who? That Ben guy?" Right then Tobias realized that Ben-guy sounded a lot like Bengay and he decided to remember that in case he ever saw the guy face to face. Wisecrack aside it was the only person he could think of that De'ryanna would want to fight about this. Besides himself of anyway. "I would've stuck around if I knew you were going to step up to him." Since he'd thought of doing the same thing since that night too. "Doctor Blake and Thor." Repeated with a weird tone. He was from the States. Where the names Doctor Blake and Thor were printed alongside cartoon illustrations in a comic book. He knew all sorts of fictions were fact especially around here but that didn't make them any easier to swallow. "Could ask the place where I saw the flier who dropped it off." He was thinking about doing that himself now. Since the place wasn't far from the site he was working at now.

"I've been going to a fight club, after hours in a more shady part of town." Well she had been, it was the truth. "I use to go nearly every night after we shared that experience..." no doubt they were nearing the boats now, at any rate the smell of was growing stronger. "Because I had all this.... fire to work out. Frustrations. And I wasn't going to go about parting my legs for a random guy to help settle me down." She didn't care if anyone heard that and though odd of her for it. "So going there and fighting helped. But then I stopped. And then.. we had that argument and I had to do something.. and so I went back there. I would have loved to fight.....Ben." There. she said half his name and she said it quickly, even brought her hand up to her chest and clutched it over her heart. "But fighting him is fighting myself and I'd take all the damage. When i went to the fight club that night I was up against another Lycan.. a male. Older and more experienced and I couldn't hold my own and was beat and taken out." She wouldn't say that her mother took her out. Fighters were taken out of fights all the time for one reason or another. Didn't matter by who. "Normally I wouldn't have gotten damaged like that but I did. And Thor and Blake are who you're thinking. Asgard isn't too far from here..."

[De'Ryanna Aybara]

Man did she get a look. One that was hard to describe. "Which that experience? " She could've meant the fight. He wasn't sure. "Are you saying having sex with me frustrated you?" Do wonders for a guy's self-esteem why dontcha De'Ryanna. He shook his head. Told himself that subject didn't matter right now anyway. Wasn't like they were in the position to touch each other. Something else she said was more important. "Hold up. So if I punched you in the eye, right now, I'd be giving that -sshole a shiner too? Or is that just if you fight him?" The possibility wasn't all that weird to him. He was a mutant who sometimes woke up in a body that wasn't his but Sam or Dex' instead. Had he ever told her that? Right now he was hoping not. Wasn't something he usually brought up with people but he'd told Ryanna more about his situation than anyone else so it was a possibility. As for Donald Blake and Thor? He didn't say a damn thing. Wasn't going to touch that one with a ten-foot pole. De'ryanna was alive, no need to dwell on who kept her that way. Instead he stopped at the railing which separated them from the river. Propping his arms up on it and watching one of the paddle boats head their way.

"Not frustrated in a bad way." She was digging quite a hole for herself wasn't she? Trying to figure out the best way to say it when he stopped at that pole and taking the question about Ben into consideration too. Ryanna watched him lean and thought about doing the same thing, but she was in a dress and that just might have looked a bit too.. odd. But she stood against it and wrapped her fingers around the railing. "It was a wonderful experience and I couldn't simply knock on your door everyday and attack you now could I?" She hoped he wasn't watching her because her adopted a tint of color and she was looking dead ahead and trying to ignore it. This wasn't exactly a topic she spoke casually about. Neither was Ben. "And yes, if you were to give me a black eye he'd suffer as well. Though something like that would heal on him fast enough to not matter. Only makes it worse when he's attacked for I don't heal as quickly. He had told her about the switching.. She only hoped that it had been the same person each time she spoke to him.

If one of the other trips had been in Toby's body when she'd been talking to him she would've known. Even when Dex played at being him someone who knew Toby worth a damned could tell. Dex was not subtle. And Sammy was too nice to be deceptive like that. He laughed. Short sarcastic sound. "Well shit. Looks like I got that part of my college career wrong too. Good thing I wasn't getting graded for my sexcapades." Before the incident that had changed everything Tobias had been living the high life at Princeton. In more ways than one. "You think babies are made by people only having sex once in a blue moon, Ryanna? What were you waiting for?" Me. He didn't say that though because even if it was true he was glad he hadn't gone after her again in that way with this Ben guy gumming up the works as bad as he was. Then he was quiet. Wheels were turning. Thinking over that link she had with Ben. "You know what they say, Ryanna? When one person opens a door it can be walked through either way. All you have to do is find something he wouldn't heal as fast from that you would and you can take him down a few pegs. Or you find a way to heal faster. Hell you're hanging out with superheroes, ask your buddy Thor what keeps him looking so young."

He wasn't doing anything to help the color on her cheeks from lessening. Men. And her fingers twitched in her want to do something to him for that comment. As much as she tried to keep it hidden she found herself smiling and bowed her head in an effort to repress that hint of a chuckle that crept from her lips. Her arms relaxed and she slouched a bit against the railing as she turned her head to look at him. "Well Thor's a god. It's different. Gods are not suppose to be old and feeble." Unless they were the god of age? Was there one and was he old? "Be---err He," catching herself before she let the name slip. "Would probably want me to beg, moreso than how I've asked already. He says I need this. I don't agree."

"Beg for what?" Sarcasm all over that. He shook his head. "I've been around the block a few times and seen a lot of styles of asshole back where I'm from. From what you've told me about him I'm in a helluva lot more danger from him than you are. We both know he'd rather make you beg by picking off people around you one by one than actually wailing on you. If he did wail on you I think it'd be more for show than anything. Think about my suggestion, Sister. It's a tactic old as time. Used in the military. Used in exorcisms. Make the host so undesirable it forces the bad guy into a situation of self-preservation. I think if push came to shove, if you found a way to -really- hurt him to a point where he had to make a choice between losing his dandy evil life versus keeping a link to you do you really think he'd really keep holding on to you? I don't. What would be the point of holding on to you if it meant possibly dying a couple minutes later? And if he died, sh-t" Tobias shrugged. "You'd be free either way. You've got to start using circumstances to your advantage, Ryanna. Even the ones you hate for even existing. Use them and find a weakness and squeeze as hard as you f-cking can."

Ryanna turned her face from him and looked down at the boats and the water. She had never been a fan of the water like her foster sister. To her water was just that, water, she didn't see the peacefulness in it. What he said made sense and it gave her an idea that she hadn't thought of before. "Your right. He wouldn't hurt me, physically." She knew that to be true. The markings, the touches, they weren't meant to physical hurt her in a cruel way, but more for a teaching way. She understood that type of pain. As she was thinking on it her eyes narrowed. "Circumstances. Circumstances... you're right. TO get what I want someone has to pay." She didn't mean in monetary means either. "That's a good idea Tobias." Her foot started to tap slightly as well as her forefinger on her right hand 'A very good idea."

"Yeah, well. I'm glad to see the horse sh-t I had to put up with back home was for a good reason." If he hadn't had to get himself out of those situations he probably wouldn't have had the base of knowledge to give her advice now. She might be looking away from him but he turned his body so that he was totally facing her. "Listen. I'm going to say this now in case something ever comes up where I'm not able to say it then. If this guy pulls his usual load of bullsh-t and something happens to me, you need to understand some things. I won't blame you for it. I won't regret meeting you. And I won't regret anything we've done or said to each other no matter what happens. Just because I try to play things smart - " Like them not getting to touchy until they could sort some stuff out "doesn't mean I run just because there's risk." It was more important to him to stick and try to protect the people he cared about than running to protect himself. Common difference between the good guys and the bad ones.

The quick glance at him wasn't needed for her to be able to tell that he was facing her, she saw it out of the corner of her eye, all it did was confirm the fact. "I wouldn't want you to die." especially not now. Not when he knew - for the most part - what she wanted to have happen between the two of them. She couldn't attempt to bond with him if he were dead. "I wouldn't want him to use you as a pawn in one of his games either." Like Tobias had said, people used other people in order to get things from a person. They used those they cared about and Benjamin knew that she cared about this guy. Slowly she turned to look at him, but not at his face for her eyes were focused on his chest in the area around his heart. "Though it pleases me to hear what you said. You have a good heart. " Perhaps she was listening for it as to why she was focusing on that area.

"I try." Short answer but the truth. Obviously he tried. No point in spending all that time in India and all that time meditating just to be a jerk. There it was. A lot had been said here at this place and there wasn't much more he could add on top of it. Tobias leaned sideways against the rail and looked at her. He saw that she wasn't looking him in the face but that didn't bother him. Only one more thing to say. "I'll be back at the inn in a couple of days." What those couple of days were going to be used for he didn't offer.

"One more thing...before you go?" She asked between chewing the inside of her cheek. While she was looking at him she was thinking of something. "You don't have to move and, and I remember not to touch you." A quick look up at him, he'd see the hint of a smile playing across her lips and maybe her fingers flexing a bit in anticipation. "I only want to see if I can feel your energy that rest about you.' figuring that telling him what she was going to do was a wise thing.

"My...energy?" Cue the perplexed look. Speaking of India. Her comment had her thinking of the five energy bodies. Maybe that's why he was confused. He was pretty sure their frames of reference when it came to energy were totally different. Each of his hands slid into his pockets as he the questions. "Which energy? Why?" He wasn't suspicious or anything like that. They were honest questions from a guy who wanted to know what the heck she was on about.

"Your Spirit energy." There was more than one? They could have shared various looks of confusion. He may as well have told her she had two heads... though her confusion was only marked by a raised brow. "Is that part of you off limits? Don't worry. it's not a physical touch and nothing can be taken from it. I find it to be soothing..." she did. It was like feeling a presence when the person came into the room. Feeling their spirit you could tell is a person was good and evil and their overall strength.

Spirit. To him that meant, "The ananda-maya-kosha." The bliss body. When a person meditated that's the part of themselves they were trying to connect to. The part outside of time, ego, intellect, pain. The wisest, happiest, eternal part of the Self. Higher than the soul. Something that guy Ben probably wished he could steal but it was beyond everyone and everything when it came to something like taking it, trapping it, stuff like that. No matter what happened to someone in lives their ananda-maya-kosha was Safe. Safe, perfect and happy. "When we first met you yelled at me for calling you Sister and you're the one who's looking to be One. Ironic huh?" He smirked at her. He wasn't saying no. There was no reason to say no.

"Because there are some who say it for ill." There was a laugh in her voice. Figure him to bring up irony, but that's what she liked. "The ananda...maya...kosha." Repeating the word that he said but in a soft whisper as she raised her right hand and held it out towards his chest, fingers together. They were not far apart and therefore she didn't have far to go, she even took a half step forward Her hand move just over his chest, right above his heart where she had been looking earlier, and closed her eyes. Her own spirit was stubborn and aggressive for that's what she often put forth. But it also hid the fear she had. Her hand stayed there a moment before her other hand rose up to be parallel on his other side. Both hands then moved slowly up his chest and to the shoulders to move down his arms and the way back to his waist True to her word she didn't touch him during this time, but if he would have moved forward, contact would have happened.

"And because I was a stinky male? Shame, shame." See what happened when you value judged people on their looks? That's what his smirking seemed to say and what he words implied. If she said that about her fear and stubbornness being in her spirit body he would have told her that wasn't the ananda-maya-kosha. That stuff was in the mano-maya-kosha. Emotional body, a lower body. If that's where she was reaching in him it was a different story. Lately there was a lot of anger in there and grief. The grief was from losing his uncle. The anger was from a couple of places including his last trip home. He stayed still. Partially because he didn't know if moving would interfere with what she was doing.

The two of them should get together for a spirit session. This was the type of Spirit she knew, the one of the body and was used in the more serious and bonding weaves that the Channelers used. Being able to feel the spirit was a start, being able to bend and control another’s was another matter. Perhaps it's because this was more tied to the persons energies. But she didn't do anything with his, only smiled slightly as she felt the anger and grief. She wasn't glad that he hd it, but she was thankful for the bit of commonality between him and her. It was comforting in it's own way. She pulled her hands away as she opened her eyes and her hands rested down at her sides. "Thank you Tobias," opening her eyes she gave him a full smile as she exhaled. She felt a lot better. "I look forward to seeing you again." That was her way of saying goodbye.

Tobias' emotional body wasn't all negative. There was also strength and a tenuous peace. At least it was peace though. Proof that all his meditating did -something-. He didn't know what she felt or saw but he could guess. The smile surprised him. He was glad to see it though. He knew she had a lot to not smile about. Same was true for him. The fact she was smiling then meant he'd done some good. "Take care, Sister." He felt he had a right to call her that now with her poking around in his spiritual bodies. He'd be the one to make the exit first. As he passed her, he reached and his hand briefly touched down on her shoulder. He didn't squeeze. Only because if he had it would have hurt her. A lot. Even just the light touch of his hand would feel heavy and solid. There was no give under the skin. The touch lasted a second, maybe two. But he wanted to do something. Then he headed to the front gates.

(le fin)

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