Re: Re-evaluation and meditation. {Open to all who are brave}

[Guest]

Tasha snickered. "It was supposed to hurt." She shook her head. "It sure wasn't supposed to tickle. And if you think you're big enough, then step up." She watched as the little monster jumped to Casie. She sighed and shook her head. One wrong move and Casie turned from a place to perch, to a puddle of blood. Tasha was not going to make the mistake of making that wrong move.

So instead she turned to Venis. "V, no one is here to hurt you, or attack you. We're here because we love you, and Casie saw you leave with the bottle and the stake. V, we know you're upset, but this, that, is not the answer. Suicide accomplishes nothing other than leaving your followers without their Goddess, and leaving your children without a mother. And leaving Shuda without a girlfriend, or have you forgotten that small detail. And plus, you would leave Kahn without his wife and Cassie and me without our best friend." She sighed and shook her head.

She looked over at Casie from the corner of her eye. Pepper was still behaving for the moment. The look she gave the two was a pleading look as she felt like she needed help. She wasn't sure what else to say other than to list the people who she would be leaving behind if she died. Her attention moved back to Venis. "Let me have the items from the alter V. We can talk this over and figure things out." She took another step towards the alter.

[Guest]

Venis let out a dramatic sigh as she turned her back on the three women. "She's just a child Cas. She just wants to be held, she knows she can't hurt you." She walked over to he make shift alter and looked down at the items she had placed upon it. "You know, if this little bottle from Wally works, you won't have to deal with Pepper and the council ever again Cas. You either Tasha." She knelt down and ran a finger of fire over the bottle.

She ran that finger above the wooden stake after that. "And you see, your lives will be so much more simple then. So many problems would end for all of you. Because if I were no longer a Goddess, I would have no reason to stay amongst the living, or the undead or anyone else who doesn't want me around anyway." Those who were in the cave were probably the only ones who wanted her around, that would be why they were here. Wouldn't it?

She turned around and looked at the trio. "Pepper, you may be older than me, but I am more powerful. And that will only change if I drink the contents of that bottle. So do not cross me child, you play with fire, you get burned." She half chuckled at her pun. "And I let Dreconis hit me, well, he kind of took a cheep shot and got away with it. As for Krystal, she hit me out of the blue and she did not get away with it. Alexander is around, but he is so not himself. And he was not around the night we are speaking of. And well, Terran is away at college. I have no idea if he even knows I'm back. Giskarl and his siblings are at home. They would never hit their mother." That was enough said about that.

She looked to Casie. She shook her head as she sighed. "Why would you think I need a friend? Just because I can't seem to keep my friends and family happy and well and ... And ... Oh why am I even bothering? You can leave me like this. Everyone else does, why not you guys as well?" Ok, so she was a touch bitter about some people never being around. But they were the ones who told her that she needed to ask them for help and needed to let them in more and all that hogwash. Yet, no one stuck around when she tried. Everyone bailed on her the minute she asked them for help.

And her head turned to Tasha. "Followers? You speak to me of followers? I never asked for one single person to follow me, to worship me. I never asked for alters to be erected in my name, I never asked for gifts to be bestowed upon me by the masses. I just wanted to save humanity so the vampire race would not starve into extinction." She sighed again as she turned to face her make shift alter once again. "No one realizes just how selfish I was being when I did this to myself. Everyone saw me as the selfless savior of the human race." Followers.

She shook her head. As she spoke again she began to move her arms in small motions. "Shuda does not have to be without a girlfriend. I can make it so Seleen would live even after my death. Bring her to me and I will do so now." She shook her head again. Something like making sure Seleen survived her death was a small task. One that Venis could do with both hands behind her back. "Seriously, go get her, I will do it. Then she and Shuda can spend the rest of eternity together if they wanted. I mean, after all, that is what is important, right? That someone doesn't die because I did. Seleen didn't want to be a vampire anyway. I didn't give her the choice when I killed her parents right before her eyes and turned her into a murderous monster." Which was exactly how Venis saw vampires, especially herself. Monsters.

And she was worried about Kahn too? "Leaving Kahn without a wife? It seems to me he would be most happy about that. And I am sure there would be a line forming around the in several times, women all wanting to take my place. Do you know when I see my beloved husband. When he comes home before I fall asleep. Or when I tell him we have a social obligation. Which is basically the holiday parties. Other than that, I do not even see my husband. And he isn't going to the house with the kids. He isn't on assignments from the Council, well, not always. I am beginning to think he is still cheating on me behind my back. Without a wife, please, he would relish such a thing." She loved Kahn more than she had ever loved any man. She had been with many men, married quite a few, but none of them were her iceberg.

Best friends, he thought that people actually considered her a best friend. "You and Casie will be fine without me. You have other friends. Ones with a lot less baggage I would guess. All of my friends have other friends, so it's not all that important for me to stick around. You wouldn't be lonely. There are others around for you guys to hang out with." She honestly could not fathom how they could ever think that they would be lost without her. They could even make more friends if they needed to. Plus, they would have a lot less to deal with if she were gone. No more council, no more Darkmane's, no more God's. They would be so much better off without her. She had never been anything but trouble for them. She ruined their lives more and more every day.

And she dared bring her children into this. "My children, you think they would even notice if I were gone?" She turned back to face them again. "Dre, has Sheena. Who he would always rather be with anyway. Alex, yea, Alex. Alex has gone off to parts unknown. There was no trace of him in his mind, just that ... Demon that his good for nothing father left behind. Krystal missed me so much while I was gone that I came back to fin her fist making contact with my jaw and her threatening to drink the blood of the dead just to spite me. Terran is away at college and has not even sent a note home. I don't think he even knows I'm back, so how would he miss me? he just knows that his tuition checks clear every month." She shook her head.

She had bee flailing her hands as she spoke, and as she trust her arm in the direction of the house little balls of fire flew from her hand. "And those four teenagers that I have at home wouldn't care one way or another if I were gone. They live with their father in my house for free. They get clothes on their back, food in their belly's, a roof over their heads and they go to one of the best schools in all of Rhy'Din. How do they repay me? They go into the war room, where they know they do not belong, and they break my claymore. They disrespect me and their father and they are constantly getting in trouble because they make bad decisions. They don't come to see me, though I went home to see them, they didn't even appreciate their Christmas gifts. They are ungrateful little brats. They were without a mother before Kahn and I married and would probably be happy to be so again." Ok, so she was a bit sore with her children, to say the least.

She looked at the three of them. Then she looked to Kjay and Leviathan. "No one here needs me. My family doesn't even want me. Radu is long dead, and the human race is safe from his tyranny. When I try to help others it just seems to piss them off these days. It's like no one wants to be safe from harm. No one wants to be protected from the dangers in their lives. I could understand a person not wanting to be protected from a paper cut. But to not want to be protected from a beast that is about to take their life? I mean, come on. What purpose do I even serve any more? Everyone wants to be in danger, everyone wants to die. So why shouldn't I let them? I spend every day of my life as sick as a dog, because they are always miserable. Yet, if I try to help, if I try to make things better or easier, they get mad. What is the point?" She was truly tired of being sick for people who didn't seem to appreciate her.

[Pepper]

Pepper clung to the woman as the puppy nipped at her clothes. She curled her finger tips pressing her nails against the flesh over the jugular. "Down puppy, I'm just sitting her, sheesh." She looked over at Tasha. "Don't tempt me kitty cat." Then she turned her attention to Venis. "You're more powerful than any of us Fireball." She continued to listen, not entirely sure of what to say. She uncurled her fingers as she listened. She had never thought that Venis felt so strongly about things. She knew that the Goddess had issues, but to call herself a monster? She had no idea that all these things were going on in her life. The Primogen was truly at a loss for words.

She lowered her legs and slid down from the red-head's arms. She moved past the puppy and Levi as she walked over towards Venis. Her tears were running down her face as she approached her. She didn't fear Venis' flames she walked right up to her. "I'm sorry you're hurting so badly Venis." She reached out to hug the Fireball and the flames seemed to move away from her. She hoped that Venis would put out the flames at least where the little Nos would be hugging her. She felt like she had to hug her. "I still love you." She was full on crying now, which was something she never did. But Venis was her friend and her friend felt unloved, and unwanted to the point of wanting to die. So how could Pepper not cry?

[Casandra Lightheart]

Kjay stopped pulling at her clothes but stayed very close. He was still tense and ready to attack until the little vamp slid down his human and headed over to the fiery one. He sat down in front of Cas not changing his form back.

Cassie listened to Venis and look a deep breath in. She was not sure what to say, she could not approach V while she was in flames like this it would burn her badly.

"Venis, you have done so much for me, it is thanks to you that my children are safe. You of all people know what that means. I love you like you were my own sister."

When the little Nos slid off of her and began walking to Venis crying she almost felt bad for her sharp words, but she still didn't want to be her mother.

[Guest]

Tasha rolled her eyes at Pepper and then turned her attention to Venis. Her mouth fell open. She simply did not sound like herself. it was so odd to hear Venis speak like this. Venis loved her family above all else. And her friends were right up there with family. Tasha was in shock for the words that were coming from Venis' mouth.

What do you say to someone in this situation? Pepper's reaction was to approach her and try to hug her, crying and telling her that she loved her. Casie's response was to remind her of the good she had done in Casie's life. Somehow Tasha felt that their words could be falling on deaf ears. She wasn't sure what to say, but somehow she felt that this was not what Venis needed at the moment.

[Guest]

Venis sighed and shook her head. "Maybe I don't want to be the most powerful Primogen. JonLouis is the head of the council, let him be the most powerful. Vlad ... Vlad should be the most powerful, after all, he is the original. Why should it be me?" She shook her head and let her head hang forward. She was getting more and more frustrated.

She saw the little monster coming up to her in tears. "It's not your fault Pepper, not your problem either." Then Pepper was getting nearer the flames and she was getting close enough to get burnt. Venis sighed and took her flesh form again to keep the child from getting burnt. Luckily, she was wearing the metal bikini her son had made her. At least that way the child wasn't hugging a nude woman.

She looked up at Casie and Tasha as she absently stroked Peppers hair. "Come on, quit crying Pepper. Yes, Casie, I know what it means to know that your children are safe. At the same time I know what it is to be laying in a coma and know that your children are not safe and that you can do nothing to save them. I know what it is to feel your Grandchildren be murdered, and be helpless to save them." She took a deep breath, one crying vampire was enough at the moment.

She looked down at Pepper who was still crying and clinging to her like she was a life saver. She knelt down and picked her up to hold her on her hip and let her cry on her shoulder instead of with her face buried against her thigh. "I know what it's like to feel your children being tortured. I know what it's like to feel one of your best friends killed, over and over again over a span of years. Omnipotence can be a pain." She looked at Pepper again. She had slowed to a sob now.

She looked back at the other two. "I know what it's like to feel another of your best friends loose the love of their life. I know that feeling very well. And yet, be powerless to help. I know the feeling of having your son mind raped. Friends dieing, family members being tortured, of and my personal favorite. The best feeling of all. To feel your husband making love to other women, and the feeling of another woman embracing him and turning him into the monster that he swore he would never become. Yes, Casie, I felt another woman trade Kahn's soul for eternal life." She shrugged her shoulders and shook her head.

She adjusted Peppers weight. "I know all those feeling and more. And for each one of them, I was powerless to help. So yea, I know how it feels to know that your kids are safe. But damned if I don't miss it." She looked at Pepper again and she was just looking back at her at this point. So she set her down. "So just let me do this and get it over with. After all, what good am I to anyone if I can't even save my own family?" She was fighting back her own blood tears.

[Pepper]

When Venis set Pepper down, she had stopped crying. She went over and sat on the ground against the wall of the cave. She looked up at the now metal clad Goddess in her flesh form. "Venis, they cannot be more powerful than you. This was your destiny. You were the chosen one. Not JonLouis, not Vlad ... Thank the God's. No, it was you Venis, and we are all thankful for it." She looked around the cave and then at the make shift alter.

She looked back at Venis. "Tell me Primogen de Toreador, do you honestly think that it was an accident that you were chosen to be as you are? No other could ever take your place. Everyone has their own trials and tribulations in life. You have to face yours just as everyone else does. The difference is, yours carry a heavier burden. And it is one that only you can bare. But that being said. If you need help, come to us, come to your friends, your peers, your allies. Don't resort to this as an answer. It will do a thousand more times harm than good. And the fact that there are people here shows that there are people who love you. And those who don't, can kiss your ass, yes?" Ok, she had spent enough time on her soap box.

She looked to the other women for some help in explaining this better. Or or a different reason all together as to why she needed to live. She had no idea how else to explain this to Venis. She was worried that Venis might just off herself after all. She was listening as she explained all the pain and suffering in her life. She had to add that to all the pain she felt from the rest of the world on a daily basis. It would be too much for Pepper and she knew that. But she had always though that Venis could handle it. She thought for sure that Venis was strong enough. She had no idea how close Venis was to cracking.

[Casandra Lightheart]

Cassie looked at Venis and then to Tasha. She saw Pepper was calming down and then took a deep breath. She sat down and looked at Kjay.

"Calm down boy please, I need to think so I can find the right words."

Kjay sat don in front of his human and stopped growling but he did not change back.

Cas wrapped her arms around her protector and then looked back at Venis.

"Venis, you are not the cause of all the problems; Vlad is. You did not ask to be kidnapped, he did it to make his vampier come back from the dead. You became what you are for a reason. You became the Goddess of Protection to save the race you became. When you did that you also became a great help to the human race as well."

She sighed and then took another deep breath.

"You lost loved ones too, but you also gained friends, and a large extended family. I would be deeply saddened by your loss were you to die. Were it not for you and the rest of the council my children and probably myself would not even be alive. I know that Tasha was in another situation. Were it not for you she would be lost as well. What ever you have gone through and whatever you feel..."

She couldn't continue if she did she was going to begin crying as well. That was not something that she could do right now. It would just make things worse.

[Guest]

Poor Leviathan. She looked around at everyone in the room and was confused as to who to try and take care of first. There was Tasha, who was seemingly unemotional about all of this. Then there was Venis, who was the most upset of everyone. There was Casie who seemed on the verge of tears. There was her best friend Kjay, who had not turned back into her best friend yet. He was still that big and bad beast. Then there was Pepper, who had already cried. What to do, what to do?

So she went over to Kjay first. She licked the side of his head. ~Kjay, she is no longer a threat. She is growing tired and will want to rest soon. Trust me, Casie is safe.~ She rubbed her head against him before turning to Casie. She rubbed her head against her to get her to pet her. She wanted to help Casie calm down a bit. She walked over to Tasha and rubbed against her as well. Just to show her some love. She then went over to Pepper and licked her face where the tears had streaked. Then she went over and laid down at Venis' feet. She wanted Venis to feel loved. All the while, the humanoids were talking.

Tasha looked over at Pepper as she spoke. The little brat had a point. Venis was destined to become what she was. Who else would have been able to handle such a thing. Tasha knew that she would have never been able to. Venis was stronger than she gave herself credit for. And Pepper had hit the nail on the head when she had tried to explain that to her.

She reached down and pet Levi when she came over to her to rub against her. Then she too took a seat upon the hard ground of the cave. It wasn't the first time she had sat upon the ground in one of these caves. But at least this time, she wasn't soaking wet. She listened as Casie spoke as well. It was a painful reminder of the pain and suffering that she and Venis had endured. If she seemed unemotional about it, it was because she was trying to avoid facing those demons again.

But Casie trailed off. That left Tasha to pick up the slack. She had no idea what she could say to make this any better for Venis. "It is all a part of the bigger picture. You know who and what you are Venis. You know what you have done, what you can do, what you will do. Provided you stick around to do it. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks or feels about you. You are the strongest woman I have ever met. You can take on anything, and I have seen you do exactly that. You think yourself selfish? Does a selfish person save lives? You saved millions, hundreds of millions." An entire race, actually two.

She shifted so she would be more comfortable. "You have done so many great things. And a few things that were rather nasty. But they have all made you who you are. And who you are is a wonderful person. I'm sorry that more people don't take the time to see that. I'm sorry that more people don't appreciate that about you. If this were a perfect world, we wouldn't need you. You would be free to love your family, and they would love you. That is, if you had a family. Think about it this way." Yes, she was about to have a this is your life moment.

She shook her head before she started. This was not going to be fun. "Ok, you were born a witch, right? Daughter of a white witch and a warlock. You were ran out of town when people found out about you. You were turned into a vampire. You spent a hundred or so years working population control. You became a God and saved the human race and the vampire race both. You moved to Rhy'Din to escape Vlad's tyranny. You met a Brujah. You met and married a werepanther. You joined the SBR. You met and married a Drow techno elf. You met and married a half dragon and whatever else Kahn is. You were kidnapped by Vlad. Now you are here. Is all this correct?" She knew it was she was just waiting for a nod.

When she saw the nod she moved on. "So because you were run out of town you became a vampire. And because you became a vampire you were there to find out that Radu wanted to exterminate the human race. Plus, Radu would have just killed Seleen had it not been for you. Because you found out what Radu wanted to do, you became a God. Which meant you were able to kill Radu and save humans and vampires alike. So there is your first act of helping others. And because you became a God, Vlad tried to control you and use you. And because he did that you moved to Rhy'Din. And because you moved to Rhy'Din you met Krow. And because you met Krow, Dre came into the world. Another unselfish act, because you gave a man something he could have never had without you. You gave him his only son." It was a good thing she was comfortable, this was going to take a minute.

"Because you were not exactly yourself for a while after Dre was born you managed to meet Gabriel. That was the best thing that could have ever happened to our pack. Because you were there, Gabriel quit torturing us for a while. We survived a lot longer than we would have had you not come along. Plus, you convinced me to go to my parents funerals, you saved my life, because I wasn't there to be lead into slaughter with the rest of the pack. Which in turn saved Leviathan's life because it meant I was around to save her when she needed me to be. Because you got away from Gabriel you were able to meet Wally. With Wally you opened And The Beat Goes On. Which is the reason you were in The Vampire Tavern that night. Had you not been in the tavern that night you would have never joined the SBR.

Plus, had you not opened the club, Zane would have died because your club wouldn't have been there for him to be able to plug in. Had you never joined the SBR you would have never met Casie. And you saved not only her, but her children too. You would have never met Gawain, and he was a wreck for a while, you helped him. You would have never met Airtia, Fallon, Trever, Jakken, Gypzee, Jennifer, Glenn, so many others. Including Alex. You were there at just the moment Alex needed you. And you would have never met Krys either, you know you saved her from starvation. Dre would have never been able to find you. Neither would I.

You would have never met Kahn. You would have never been able to welcome his children into your life. And they love you V, they truly do. You would have never been out for that walk, in that area of Rhy'Din when you found Terran. Would he have survived had you not found him? Would Jakken have survived the attack from Drexl had you not been there? I would have never met Gareth, that's for sure. And Venis. Had we not been kidnapped, Dre might have never found out how psychotic his wife was, until she killed him. Krystal would have never learned to survive on her own. Terran probably would have never gone to college.

So many of our friends and loved ones would have never gotten to experience things that they did because you put them in a bubble. You can't help it. It's who you are. You're our protector. And if we had never been kidnapped, we would have never ended up here. Seleen would have never met Shuda. Casie would have never gotten her kids back. You would have never gotten back in touch with Eros and I know he's one of your oldest friends. Pun intended. There is so much that would have never happened without you. And there are so many things yet to come that we need you here for. Why would you want to throw it all away? Because your kids are acting like your kids? Because your husband is as big a workaholic as his wife? Come on Venis, you're better than this." She waved her hand in the direction of the make shift alter. She felt like she was rambling, but Venis needed to hear it.

[Guest]

Venis stood silent as she listened to Pepper. Soap box was right. If Pepper hadn't stopped when she had, Venis would have interrupted her because she was starting to get a little preachy. And Venis was in no mood for preachy. But when Pepper was through, Venis, of course, had something to say. "I am quite sure that had another been given this responsibility, they would be more than capable of handling it. After all, they would have to." She sat down on the ground and crossed her legs at the knees to wrap them around herself. Always a lady.

She sighed and shook her head. "But you see Pepper, this is where the problem lies. You say that if they don't love me, or don't like me, they can kiss my ass. But that's just it. I cannot run around telling people to kiss my ass. My job is to be there for them and help them survive despite their opinion of me. I have to protect life. And when someone tells me directly that they do not want my help, then and only then, can I walk away. I have to sit here every day, all day and all night, and judge if someone needs me or not. And all I have to go on, to figure this out, is how sick to my stomach I am and if I can feel someone's pain or fear above everyone else's. And I can't choose to say that I'm not going to help someone who needs me. No matter who or what they are." She had even kept Benjamin, of all beings, from harm when he did something to help her.

She sighed again as she shook her head. "So, maybe someone else would do a better job than I. Who's to say they wouldn't?" She believed every word of it. Then it was Casie's turn to speak. So again Venis sat there and listened. What else could she do, right? Casie had a lot to say about how this wasn't her fault and how she had done so much and had this big family that would miss her. If they would miss her so damned much, then where were they? They obviously weren't there to try and stop her.

She looked up at Casie and shook her head. "Casie, even you have to sympathize with Vlad on some level. He lost a Granddaughter, his own flesh and blood, from a bloodline that has been being kept alive since he was human. You have to admit that you would want your child or Grandchild back too if it were you. He doesn't turn everyone in his bloodline into vampires, only a few per generation. And she was lost because of something stupid he did. Not something she herself did. So he feels guilty for her death. How would you feel, wouldn't you want her back?" Yes, it was Vlad who had messed up the day he sent Seleen and Zsuzsanna out on patrol.

She shook her head again. "And yes, I do have a rather large extended family. But where are they? Hmmm, where are they when I need them? Why is it that they do not come to my side in my hour of need? Why is it that they, as well as my direct family, shun me more with each passing day? I must truly be a horrible person for them to all treat me as they do, yes?" She was about to say something else when Tasha figured she would finish Casie's sentence for her. But she didn't stop there. No, evidently, Tasha had found her own soap box to stand upon. So again Venis was silenced so she could listen. She could have interrupted or tried to talk over them, but they were in a cave. The echo alone would be enough to drive anyone mad. And there were several in the cave with overly sensitive hearing. So she waited.

Tasha had suddenly decided to open up the flood gates. She had an awful lot to say. How long had she been holding back to let it all out like she was? Or was it that she just suddenly decided that she would remind Venis about her entire life. Like she needed a reminder. She remembered it better than Tasha did, after all, she had lived it. Bit she let Tasha rattle on and on. She rolled her eyes a few times. She sighed a few more times. She shook her head plenty. Her whole 'This is your life' moment was waisted on Venis. After all, how could she forget things that she remembered well enough to tell Tasha about them. Of course, there were some details missing from Tasha's little story. Like the seven husbands she had before she had even moved to Rhy'Din. Venis never spoke of them because she had no need to. She had out lived them all and they were a part of her life back on Earth, so why talk about them at all. But they existed once upon a time.

When Tasha was through Venis let out another sigh. "Tash, I am well aware of my own life. Even the parts you don't know about so couldn't even mention. I did not need to be reminded of those things. I don't need to hear how great I am, or how much I have accomplished, or how the world would have suffered without me, or anything along those lines. What I need is my children's love. I need my friends to remember that they are my friends. I need my husband to be around more. I need my loved ones around me to support me and help me survive my day to day life. None of you can tell me that it will happen. None of you can tell me that I will have Krys back tomorrow. Or that Alex will suddenly start acting like himself. Or that Dre is going to come to me and tell me that he loves me and ask me to help him become a greater God or help him figure out his new station in life, or ask me if he can help me with anything. You can't tell me that Terran is going to come by on his next break just to visit mommy." She slowly closed her eyes to fight back her blood tears.

When she opened her eyes again she continued. "None of you can tell me that Kahn is suddenly going to have less work to do and will have more time for me. Or that our children are going to come see me, or be happy to see me when I go home for something. Or how about Gawain? Hmm? Can any of you tell me that he is going to wake up in the morning and come knocking upon my door to hang out with me again? Or that any of my friends or family will? Other than you guys, no one will. I sit alone in my room with my paperwork, day after day after day after day. Sure, I have to run off for a minute here or a minute there. But who even notices when I am gone? Not even you guys notice. So how can anyone else when they don't care?" She shook her head. They just didn't get it.

[Pepper]

[[Sorry guys, had some drama IRL, and then I lost my post when I tried to send it just a second ago. But hopefully now we can polish this off soon. Not that I don't want to continue playing. ]]

Pepper just sat there and listened. She had chose to let Casie and Tasha have their say before she would reply to Venis. And as she listened she was amazed. Pepper had lived a whole lot longer than Venis and yet she had not done one sixteenth the living that Venis had. What a sheltered life Pepper had lived. She had only ever had three husbands in her entire existence. She had never hit puberty in life, so would never be able to give a child to anyone no matter what or who intervened. She would never have children, an extended family, or so many of those other things that Venis had or had done. But Pepper wasn't jealous, or envious, she was in awe.

When Casie and Tasha were finished she chose to speak. "I still say that no one could ever take your place. Venis, how many people do you think have ever told me that they love me? Only one that I can think of in the last three hundred years, and that's you fireball. You love and respect all things great and small and their right to life. Even if you don't like someone or something, you still protect it as if your life depended upon it. It's the white witch in you. That is why you are the perfect woman for the job, he only woman for the job. No one else has so much love to give V, no one." If that didn't convince her than nothing would. Because in order to continue to love, respect and protect life, she had to love, respect and protect her own first.

[Casandra Lightheart]

Kjay looked at Levi. He licked her back and layed down on the floor in front of his human. ~I trust you.~ He was still to excited to change back but he did try to start relaxing.

Cas smiled at Levi sadly and petted her as she moved between the humans.

She listened to Tasha then Venis and finally Pepper. Cas was mentaly exausted but Venis seemed to be calming down a little bit. There was nothing left to say.

[Guest]

Tasha had given her ten scents worth. She wasn't quite sure what else there was to say. Pepper had summed things up rather nicely. Which said a lot for the kid. Tasha looked at Leviathan leaning against Venis' thigh and smiled. "Face it V, we all love you too much to let you go." She was a little smug in her comment, because she knew it to be fact. And Venis was just going to have to live with it.

She looked back at the make shift alter once again. "So can we go back to the Inn now? Is the dramatic crisis over?" She figured she would take the items from the alter back to her room so that Venis couldn't use them. "I think we could all use a good stiff one." She grinned, hoping that someone got the joke. But she only waited a moment before she added. "Drink ladies, a good stiff drink." She winked and chuckled.

[Guest]

Venis sighed and shook her head. She placed an elbow on her knee and put her head in her hand. "Do you guys honestly think that I have never heard any of this before? Do you truly believe that in almost three hundred and thirty three years I have never been told all the things I have done for others and how great and wonderful the world thinks I am? But it's not the rest of the worlds admiration and acceptance I need. I have that." She sighed again.

She looked up at them as she draped her arm over her knee. "You guys don't get it, and from the sounds of things, you never will. This is not about what the world thinks of me or how I can serve the world or make it a better place or what the ... Whatever. This is about the fact that I have lost my family and I feel like I am nothing without them. They are my reason to live. And I don't care if that sounds irrational or not. I just want my family." She shook her head more as she got up off the floor.

She walked over to the alter and slid her bottle back into it's velvet pouch and closed up the box that held the stake. She gathered the things off of the stone and looked back at the others. "Come on, let's go. You guys aren't going to get it and I'm tired of discussing it. Pepper looks ready for a nap and you guys aren't going to leave me alone to do this so we should just go back to the Inn." She headed for the mouth of the cave.

And the four women, the wolf, and the panther headed back to the Inn.

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